


Follow My Sea to Your Ocean

by CinnamonDjinn



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Hopeful Ending, Introspection, LITERALLY, M/M, Oblivious Keith (Voltron), Pining Shiro (Voltron), shiros got it hard, why is that in caps
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-15
Updated: 2019-11-15
Packaged: 2021-01-31 04:20:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,683
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21440110
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CinnamonDjinn/pseuds/CinnamonDjinn
Summary: In which some stark clone memories force Shiro to think critically about who his best friend is and what he means to him. He also desperately needs a glass of water.
Relationships: Keith/Shiro (Voltron)
Comments: 22
Kudos: 112





	Follow My Sea to Your Ocean

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Helvetious](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Helvetious/gifts).

> Inspired by and gifted to @diococky. Thank you for all of the works and ideas you provide that helps fuel this fandom, and also for inadvertently getting me to finish a fanfic after 10 years of inactivity. Go check out their work on Twitter; it's superb!

It's not the first memory, the second, or even the third that does him in.

Despite the integration that had happened between Shiro's soul and the clone's body, even though he was considered healthy enough to leave the pod, it wasn't exactly a one-and-done procedure. Maybe if Allura had had more experience with quintessence transference, but regardless, she had done her best and Shiro will forever be grateful.

It's not even a particularly bad thing to go through; for the most part it just means Shiro doesn't quite have all of the clone's memories yet. They slowly trickle into his own memory, sometimes as errant whispers of thought, other times lengthy dreams where he feels himself relive it moment for moment. Thankfully, that has only happened the second time, and it was a play-by-play of the Monsters and Mana game that his clone had enjoyed alongside the team.

He loved being a paladin; of course he would pick it every time.

The first wisp of recollection he ever had was nothing more than Haggar's voice; her words about what he would do to the current Black Paladin, to Keith, had sent shivers down his spine, but the unnerved feeling didn't last. It couldn't, because everything she had said was the truth – their bond did run deep, and he would forever treasure it. Haggar had thought to use it as a weapon against them; she had horribly underestimated Keith.

As horrific and terrifying as the whole fight in the clone factory had been, the strongest emotion that he felt, that overcame even the disconcerting rush of confusion as the clone was freed from Haggar's control, was pride. Keith had told them all once the group had finally gotten a chance to rest that he had seen premonitions of the fight while on the space whale. That he chased after Shiro's double alone without hesitation, that he persevered through a fight that bruised his body and burned his face, only to commit his all toward saving his attacker, left his heart glowing with appreciation for the leader, the man that Keith had become.

The third memory was more vivid and thus more confusing. It was the moment when the clone begged Black (and in truth, himself) to accept him back as her pilot. It had taken Shiro a few moments after the vision had ended to parse through what he had seen; it had been disconcerting to relive it both through the clone's eyes and his own memories of that moment at the same time. But it the end, all it left him was a bittersweet tang in his heart, a reminder that his clone wasn't evil in the slightest; he, like Shiro, had just wanted to protect those he cared about.

But no, it's the fourth memory that finally gets under his skin.

He's standing behind the pilot's chair in the Black Lion as Keith runs drills with the rest of the team alongside Krolia. Really, Shiro's not providing much value beyond occasional words of encouragement, but he'll be damned if he sits out of anything just because he's down an arm and a lion. It does mean that no one is really expecting him to speak up much as Krolia drives the session, which is good because when the memory hits, it takes his vision and his sense of self with it.

He (Shiro? The clone?) is standing next to Hunk and Coran on the castle bridge. They'd been waiting for Allura to return with Lotor when they had been hailed by someone claiming to be Keith. Keith, who they hadn't heard from in weeks. The vid screen pops up just long enough for them to receive a visual confirmation that it is indeed him (though Lance thinks he might be a clone. Ha. The irony) before it cuts off. Still, the team prepares themselves for whatever might walk out of the unidentifiable craft after it lands. The fabric of his suit crinkles as Shiro - the clone - squeezes his right hand into a fist, ready to move quickly in case it's not really Keith after all.

It's Keith. Ohhhhh boy is it Keith.

He hasn't seen the previous Paladin as a kid in a long time; even before they left Earth Keith cut an athletic if a little lanky figure and he was self-assured in his skills and body that was more fitting of a young adult than a teenager (which, at 19, he barely even was). When Keith had piloted Black to protect Shiro on that unnamed planet, that moment cemented in his mind that Keith was a peer, and not an underling that needed constant guidance like the others. Keith had his back just as much as Shiro had his.

Still, he's expecting that lanky teen to be the one who exits the craft, and not the man who strides over to them with a confident determination he had never seen him wear before. There's no hint of the uncertainty he had from before; he walks across the bridge like he's meant to have been there this whole time, like he never second guessed himself as belonging with the paladins before he left. He's in his Blade suit which has been more than filled out, both in height and in width; Shiro can see the distinct definition of his clavicle, resting on top of a chest more defined by muscle than by armor. The edges of his face are sharper now, his cheekbones having lost any semblance of baby fat, but his jawline is the opposite; it's broader than he remembers.

Speaking of broader – has Keith's shoulders always been so wide? It's a vivid contrast against the smallness of his waist. Shiro's pretty sure it's small enough that he could wrap both hands around it.

That's the jarring thought that finally gets his motor skills (somewhat) working.

“K- Keith!”

It's not one of his finer moments.

At least he's not drooling.

Yet.

The stuttering sound of his voice pulls the Blade's gaze toward him as he nears, and the hardened lines of his sapphire eyes soften into a familiar warmth that is so much more intense than Shiro has ever seen, even when previously directed at him. He doesn't know what it means, just that it keeps him from getting any further semblance of words out.

“Shiro.....?”

“Shiro, are you alright?”

With a small gasp the Garrison pilot snaps out of the memory, Keith's face in front of him, suddenly with his Galra-heritage-like scar. He's still in his pilot seat, but now he's turned around to face Shiro, his right hand he's using for leverage to twist on the chair dangerously close to where Shiro's left one is clutching the seat back. He doesn't seem to notice however, his expression instead locked onto Shiro's with a look of concern.

“Shiro, can you hear me?” Keith asks a bit more intently.

The previous Black Paladin shakes his head, trying to dispel the remnants of the past he just witnessed. His vision clears, taking in the calming backdrop of space and Krolia standing off to the side on the tablet. She's likely programming another drill, but he can tell from her body language that she's also trying to give them privacy. He's grateful because it means it's one less person to witness his fluster. He might have shaken off the vision, but he can't shake the feelings it brought.

And right now the biggest one is a tightness in his suit he didn't remember starting the drill with.

Thank God there's an oversized chair between him and the rest of the room. It still doesn't stop him from stuttering or from the flush that spreads across his face.

“I, ah.” He coughs. “I'm fine.”

His assurance only makes Keith's brow further furrow. “Was it another flashback about the clone?”

It's unfair that even after all of the confidence Keith exhibits since he returned to the team, his current expression is one of endearing innocence. It doesn't do a thing to extinguish Shiro's raging hard-on, only adds a helping of guilt on top of it.

“Yeah.... I.... yeah, something like that.” If he stays one more minute he's going to prove that humans are capable of self-combusting. “I, ah, need a moment.” He doesn't wait for a reply, although he hears an uncertain response of “sure” as he quickly pivots while he still has the cover of the chair before hurrying out of the room.

Shiro rushes to the side cargo room they've been using as bedroom and leans back against the door as it slides shut, exhaling as his head bangs against the metal behind him. Slowly he looks down, and, yeah, it's not discreet what-so-ever. For all the padding that the fabric of the paladin suits have, it does nothing to hide the evidence of his arousal. For a second he wonders if Alteans even get erections.

It doesn't make sense to him (his reaction, not the suit thing). He's seen Keith's older self this whole time, ever since their brief meeting in Black's mindscape. Yet he doesn't recall ever feeling such intensity of a physical reaction as the clone had experienced that morning. But in the end he knows he can't deny this. His feelings about his M&M character were the same as his clone's; the desperation the clone had felt when trying to bond with Black was exactly what he would have felt if he was in the same situation. Why would this be any different?

Shiro takes a grounding breath and closes his eyes, thinking back to _his_ earliest memories after his quintessence was separated from Black's and placed into the clone's body. He tries to think of the moment he first saw Keith; yeah, there was the moment in the mindscape and he did notice a difference then, namely in height, but Keith had been stressed and distraught from both the fight and the discovery of the real Shiro's untimely demise. Not exactly grounds for any sort of pleasant feelings.

The next moment he can recall was the first time he woke up, just after Allura had transferred him. The memory was erratic and broken however; even as he opened his eyes and sat up with a gasp, his mind was reeling from the separation from Black, his spirit was reeling from leaving the warmth of Allura's essence and being displaced in the cold of the clone's. His vision had swam, and though he briefly registered collapsing into Keith's arms and whispering a few words that even now he couldn't recall, he had almost immediately fallen unconscious once more.

It's when he thinks of the last time he awoke that he uncovers his sought-after realization. It had been the first time he was coherent enough to put everything together, and he had looked up to see Keith's aged face sighing out a warm smile of relief. It was the way he leaned in ever so slightly before pulling Shiro close, his embrace strong yet gentle. Cherishing. It was the strength he used to help Shiro sit up, and the gruff authority of his voice as he instructed the team to prepare to disembark from the rest stop. Shiro had sat exhausted in the pod, disjointedly watching Keith in his element, finally getting a chance to drink in the sight of him. And the feeling that grew in his chest wasn't just one of physical appreciation, but appreciation of everything that Keith was and is. The fondness, the pride, and yeah, there had been an edge of excitement as his eyes took in Keith's form.

Sure, it had been startling for the clone at the time, namely because he wasn't worn and distracted from having just fought for his life. The clone knew Shiro mattered to Keith but didn't have an inkling of an idea of just how deep that devotion went. So when Keith had stepped out of the craft looking like Adonis in half-galran-half-human form, of course arousal would be the only emotion to hit him hard. By the time it came to Shiro's turn, it had transformed into something both more wonderful and terrifying, a cacophony of feelings too complex to initially understand.

It was this realization that leads Shiro to the decision to move to the Green Lion after Krolia departs with Kolivan. He needs to sort everything out, and he needs the time and space to do so. Pidge is the safest bet thanks to the fact that she prefers to spend her off-time alone with her computers and is thus the most likely of the paladins to let him be when he needs to think. And he has a lot of thinking to do.

He also needs to limit the likelihood of publicly sporting a hard-on, and he's likely to have a better chance hanging with his friend's younger sister who he sees as his own rather than his best friend who he suddenly wants to ravish. 

Shiro knows it's coming, but the guilt still hits him hard when he hears Keith call his name as he's heading up Green's ramp. He turns to see Keith striding up to him; he's not rushing to catch up like he might have when he was younger – instead the grace he moves with reminds him of a panther.

God, he wants Keith to devour him like one.

The feeling is diminished however when Keith speaks again, his tone mostly neutral but with a barely-hidden bereft edge. It's a cold shower to Shiro when knows he's the cause of it.

“Are you... riding with Pidge now?” It's a bit of a silly question when he can easily spot the bag of the scant items Shiro still owns slung over his shoulder, but he doesn't blame him for asking. It's also the first time since he awoke that he's seen or heard any sort of uncertainty in Keith.

“...Yeah. I just... need to work through some things, and I think a change in scenery might help.” He's glad his voice for once isn't stuttering for this. “I'm sorry.”

To his surprise however, Keith only gently smiles. He can tell it's genuine by the way it touches Keith's eyes. “It's okay, Shiro. I understand. It doesn't matter the reason; just take whatever time you need. You know I'm not going anywhere.”

Just when he thinks that the Black Paladin couldn't get any more endearing. It nearly breaks his resolve, but he knows he's got to do this if he ever wants to do right by Keith. And he does, so, so badly.

Shiro still crosses the last of the distance between them to rest his remaining hand on Keith's shoulder. “Thank you, Keith. We'll talk soon about it all, I promise. As soon as I can get my head on straight and find the words.” Until he can get the level of confidence in his feelings that Keith has. He's not sure what exactly the feeling is, but it shows in the way the ex-cadet tilts his head toward his shoulder as he places his hand over Shiro's, something he's never done before.

“Okay,” Keith states simply. “I trust you.”

_You probably shouldn't, _he dry-pans in his head as he thinks back to a few moments ago where he wanted to do nothing more than press Keith up against a wall, kissing him desperately until Keith feels as good as he makes Shiro feel.

Still, he smiles as he gently squeezes his shoulder when they part. He gives one final wave as he begins to trek back up the ramp, knowing Keith is behind him watching him go every step of the way. Shiro looks down to his gloved hand, gently curling it into a fist as if to physically hold onto that last touch. Despite all of the confusion, all of the uncertainty, he feels a swell of hope in his chest.

He's not ready yet but he will be, and when he is, Shiro's going to show Keith just how much he means to him, tenfold.

**Author's Note:**

> Spoiler alert:  
Season 8 doesn't happen because this scene causes the universe to split into an alternate timeline where S8 Shiro has more emotional capacity than just a cardboard cutout. ¬_¬
> 
> Instead, after Voltron and Co push back the Galra invasion on Earth, Shiro approaches Keith on their last day on Earth to tell him about all of the things he finally figured out, and then Keith cuts him off to instead turn his fantasies into a reality.
> 
> And of course they all live happily ever after (including Allura).
> 
> The end.
> 
> Come help me support other content creators on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/Omnidolor), or to chat about fandom or writing!


End file.
